.

.

... Negro, please

2002-11-06 // 2:05 p.m.

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Uptown called me last night.

Actually, he didn't really "call" per say. He instant messaged me. If you check the date on our convo about Seattle, you'll know the date of our last actual conversation. I haven't seen or heard from him since then... until now.

Oh.. and that earth shatteringly profound and emotionally heartfelt IM? The one whose words were apparently supposed to touch me so deeply that I would feel compelled to declare that all is forgiven and run unabashedly into the arms of this knight in shining armour???

"hey. i'm home now."

Uh...

What?

Negro, please! I ain't ya friend! We are NOT cool like that! How are you gonna play yourself and then, after like a GAZILLION years step to me like we just kicked it yesterday over a slice with extra cheese and a mutha f*ckin Yoo Hoo?!! AND you're not even single??!! Nah, Playa!! I don't think so!!

But wait!!!

It gets better!

So there we are, right? Him IM-ing and me refusing to answer. Well, I'm guessing that at this point, he must have felt like he needed to pull out the big guns because all of a sudden, ya boy starts professing his undying love for me. He's going on and on about how after all his soul searching he now realizes that I am the woman he wants --- no NEEDS in his life. Yeah... yeah... sure... whatever. I never did respond. That was last night.

Bust how I come into work today and ole boy's on the IM again! So what little jewel of finely spun romance does he try to woo ya girl with today??

"hey baby. i need your numbers. i lost them."

What the F*CK??!!!

Oh Heeeeelllll no!!!

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